


Your Cold Eyes

by Mingyou17



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: And they were neighbours, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Single Parents, baby nam dohyon, but also fluff, single parent Seungyoun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2020-09-27 08:42:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 12,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20404882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mingyou17/pseuds/Mingyou17
Summary: As a young single father, Seungyoun was used to being judged. So why did his neighbour Wooseok's cold gaze hurt so much?





	1. Judgement

Seungyoun was used to it, he really was. He knew the minute that the small six-year-old clinging to his sleeve called him ‘dad’ that the admiring glances at a cute brotherly bond would morph into judgemental stares at the young, 23-year-old father, the pair’s scruffiness seemingly more apparent than before. He knew that he was the most popular topic of conversation amongst the mothers at the playground, who took turns alternating between pitying poor Dohyon who doesn’t even have a mother, who drowned in his massively oversized second-hand uniform (Seungyoun had begged to buy it from another parent, hoping it would last until he reached a point where he could afford another), and criticising his good for nothing father who couldn’t dress his child or himself properly, whose lunchboxes were never nutritious enough, whose child was too thin, who they didn’t want talking to their kids or going around their houses. 

It hurt every time he overheard them and every time they stared at him or passed snarky comments, but mostly because they weren’t just attacking him with their words, they were targeting his son. But he’d grown tired of defending himself; when Dohyon was in nursery or had just started school, he’d been enraged and had poured out his soul and his struggles but it never seemed to matter, he was just another teenager who was too stupid to use a condom, never mind bring up a child. The glares reminded him of his own parents when they’d told a seventeen-year-old Seungyoun, who’d knocked up a girl they hadn’t even met, that if he was to even associate himself with that child, they didn’t want to hear or see of him again. At that moment he resolved himself that he’d just follow their advice, he didn’t even know how to do laundry and he certainly didn’t have many savings, how could he support himself and a new-born? It was too late for the baby to be aborted, the mother had not realised what was happening, they were only seventeen after all. She wanted nothing to do with the child since she was a child herself, and it was bad enough that she had to give birth to it. Seungyoun understood, but when he snuck out the house on his bicycle at midnight to see the baby in the hospital, he couldn’t bring himself to put the child down. The thought of giving this child away to someone else brought him to tears, the nurse, who he thought perhaps saw this scene more than she should, patted him on the back gently as he held his child tighter. It was there Seungyoun gave up everything – his family, his friends, his education – just for the little baby in his arms that he didn’t deserve but loved more than anything. Yes, he was more than used to his son, his Dohyon, being viewed as little more than a mistake, and Seungyoun’s decision to rectify that being seen as irresponsible but over the years, slowly and painfully, he’d begun to stop caring what other people thought. Yet somehow his neighbour Wooseok’s cold gaze seemed to cut him the deepest. Seungyoun didn’t really understand why, he’d barely spoken to the man. All he knew was that he was around his age and he lived in the fancy houses across from his flat, with his shiny car and stable job and that whenever he seemed to see him, he was looking at him and Dohyon so coldly.

It had been a long six years and Seungyoun was surprised every day that the pair of them had managed to get this far and was continuously shocked by how much Dohyon had grown. Each morning, as he stared up at the stained ceiling above him, Dohyon beside him in the double bed that he was terrified of his son outgrowing, or of the point he realises he hates sleeping in the same bed as his dad, he confronts the part of him that regrets his decision. If Dohyon had been adopted, would he be in a tiny one-bedroom apartment, with little more than a small kitchen and a bathroom? Would he be slightly underweight and his father definitely so from the skipped meals as a result of his empty bank account or just small portions so that one meal could last multiple days? Would he have seen his adopted parents cry as much as he had his father? It seemed unlikely. But selfishly, he couldn’t make himself truly regret it when he felt love for Dohyon stronger than he knew was possible. Every moment was difficult, but Dohyon was all he hadn’t known he’d needed and he would do anything to make him happy, anything to protect him from the negatively that was always directed towards them.

Quietly getting ready for the day so that he could give Dohyon a few more minutes of sleep, Seungyoun slipped on his uniform and a hoodie over the top to disguise from judging eyes that he worked for minimum wage at a terrible fast-food restaurant, because where else would offer the hours that meant he could drop off and pick Dohyon up from school? Working for little money for short hours would still leave him better off than properly working and paying for childcare.

The scent of bread toasting must have awoken Dohyon, who hobbled into the kitchen, his hair resembling a bird’s nest and his face slightly puffy.

“Morning, dad.” He grumbled, eagerly going into Seungyoun’s outstretched arms for a morning hug, which was always Seungyoun’s favourite.

“Good morning, baby.” Seungyoun said, unable to stop himself from smiling at his son while trying to smooth out his hair.

“Not a baby.” Dohyon grumbled as Seungyoun buttered his toast – certainly no pricey spreads in this household.

“Right! My Dohyon is a big boy!” Seungyoun laughed, amused at how Dohyon puffed out his chest. His tiny, baby chest. They talked for a while, and Seungyoun was always impressed by how Dohyon never ran out of things to talk about.

“Are you sure I can’t go on the school trip? Everyone is going.” Dohyon whined, mouth filled with toast, and if the comment hadn’t knocked Seungyoun so off guard he might have chastised the boy’s manners for it.

“You know I can’t afford that right now, kiddo. We can do something fun though! We have board games!” Thanks to a charity shop clearance sale after Seungyoun had found some money on the street, obscure board games was about the only entertainment Seungyoun really had for Dohyon, which meant that he had learnt to be extremely creative and how to conjure enthusiasm about playing them yet again.

“We’ve played them all so many times.” The young boy grumbled, making Seungyoun frown. They’d played this game; Dohyon would want something and Seungyoun would have to say no in the kindest way possible. Sometimes Dohyon would cry and scream and Seungyoun would hate himself for not being able to provide simple things for his child and would hate Dohyon ever so briefly for not understanding why he was saying no. Later, Seungyoun would still hate himself, but he’d remember that he couldn’t expect Dohyon to understand their financial situation, and then he’d hate himself even more for even contemplating being disappointed in his son. Luckily, a lot of the time Dohyon would sigh and maybe sulk for a little while, but his bad moods never lasted long anymore.

“You know I’d do everything in my power for you, this is just one thing I don’t have control over… Now go get ready!” Painting a smile onto his face, Seungyoun stood up and gently pushed at Dohyon to hurry him on his way. As soon as the boy disappeared into the bathroom, the father sank back down onto his chair, sighing as tears prickled his eyes, he really would never be enough, would he?

Starting the day in a bad mood was never ideal, and as he scurried Dohyon out of the flat, his tattered and stained backpack in tow, Seungyoun could think of an infinite number of things he would prefer than meeting the eyes of Wooseok. The smaller man was also just leaving his home, his face fairly blank until his eyes met the father and son duo, when his expression darkened. Seungyoun couldn’t help but glare back, something he didn’t think he’d done before, placing a hand on his son’s shoulders and pulling him tighter, shielding him from view, as they began the walk to school. Dohyon talked throughout the journey, as he was turning into quite the chatter-box, but Seungyoun couldn’t find it in him to fully concentrate. What was Wooseok’s deal? Although he would never admit it, he did to an extent understand the mothers who criticised him. They knew what it took to be a parent; the maturity, the money, the time and as far as they could see, he didn’t have it. Wooseok, however, saw them for less than a minute a day, who was he to judge him? Seungyoun knew he shouldn’t care, Wooseok was nothing to him, but he couldn’t knock the thought that he needed to change the shorter man’s mind somehow.


	2. Ice Prince

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Face to face, he's an ice price for sure.

Pick-up time from school was always bittersweet for Seungyoun. Even though he did it every day and should be used to the separation by now, he missed Dohyon every second that they were apart and as soon as the small flood of children burst onto the playground, he couldn’t suppress the pang of excitement that filled him as he anticipated his son running towards him for a hug. However, as he stood vaguely near to the other parents for Dohyon’s class, he knew that he’d end up as an honourable mention in at least one of their conversations. It had gotten worse over the last year, after declining slightly when they’d run out of new ‘facts’ about his lifestyle. Fortunately for Seungyoun, Dohyon was showing signs that he was naturally academically gifted already and was excelling as much as a six-year-old in a public school could. Seungyoun himself didn’t believe in forcing children to slave over books that they weren’t interested in and just wanted Dohyon to pursue his interests, provided that those interests could be served by their local library during the weekends. The other parents were clearly more ambitious and pushy and certainly resented Dohyon’s success and Seungyoun was not too pleased to hear his son, and of course his parenting, being belittled. However, though Seungyoun always tried to not be petty, it was hard to hide his smile when he overheard their jealousy; Dohyon was unknowingly proving all their assumptions about him wrong.

More often than not, the kids around him would be picked up by just one parent, which Seungyoun took refuge in, it being just one small moment where he was not out of the ordinary and didn’t stand out too much from a distance. However, that day, just to his left, Seungyoun watched as a young girl, probably a little bit older than Dohyon, rushed towards her mother and father to be embraced by the pair of them while they took her bag and patted her head and listened to her talk excitedly about her day. Seungyoun was used to feeling lonely, or perhaps it would be better to say alone, and he thought that perhaps it was a feeling permanently bubbling under the surface. Yet now and again, like in that moment, it would overwhelm him, and he would wonder how he’d gotten this far, and how he could continue. He wondered if other single parents felt like this, if other people his age felt like this, if anyone understood.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by the shrill scream of ‘Dad!’ as Dohyon rushed towards him, knocking him slightly backwards as he barged into his legs, wrapping his arms around him. Quickly scooping him up, Seungyoun lifted Dohyon up so that they were eye level, the pair wearing matching beaming smiles. Seungyoun always found it amazing and baffling how his negativity and sadness could be erased, if only briefly, by the small being in his arms who was growing bigger and heavier with every day that passed.

“Hiya, buddy!” Seungyoun exclaimed, squeezing Dohyon close quickly before lowering him down. Dohyon immediately clasped onto his father’s hand and began pulling him forwards by skipping. Seungyoun didn’t hesitate to join in, wilfully ignoring the attention their movements and loud laughter attracted to them. Eventually, the pair slowed down and began the twenty-minute walk home, with Dohyon never failing to fill the entire journey recounting his day. Stopping abruptly halfway, Dohyon practically threw off his backpack and began rifling through it for something.

“Here!” He exclaimed, holding out a crumpled, pastel piece of paper out towards Seungyoun, looking extremely pleased with himself.

“Oh? What has Dohyonie made today?” Seungyoun asked, not having to feign even the slightest amount of enthusiasm since he was genuinely always interested in what his son made.

“We had to draw our families!” Dohyon said happily but Seungyoun’s heart dropped a little as he looked down at the piece of paper. On it was a drawing of himself and Dohyon in what was quite clearly to him their bedroom. He’d drawn them with big smiles, which was a relief for Seungyoun. But the paper was large, and their section took up what seemed to be an oppressively small corner of it.

“Everyone drew a lot more people, so I decorated mine! I think mine is the prettiest!” Dohyon exclaimed, beckoning for Seungyoun to lower the drawing so he could point at the drawings of books, board games and flowers that he’d littered haphazardly across the remainder of the page. Seungyoun could just picture it: Dohyon excitedly drawing the two of them, only to look round at his classmates drawing parents, siblings, cousins, grandparents and pets and realising that he didn't have that, that he'd have to fill in the space because Seungyoun had taken everything from him, that Seungyoun had made that page so empty. Of course, Dohyon probably didn't think that way, not yet at least, but Seungyoun always would. 

“Of course it is! You’re a little artist! I’m so proud of you.” Seungyoun said as he crouched down, placing a quick kiss on Dohyon’s forehead as he slotted the drawing back into his backpack.

“I know I don’t have a mommy but why don’t we have any other family?” Dohyon asked as they began walking again. Surprisingly, it wasn’t a question Dohyon had really asked before. Quite quickly after he’d started school, he’d asked why he didn’t have a mother, the difference between himself and his classmates being so obvious. Of course, the school taught him words like brother, uncle and grandmother, words that Seungyoun had had no need to have taught him before, and his son had returned from school with questions, but oddly they were limited to ‘do I have a [blank]?’

“Because I love you enough for 100 people!” Seungyoun replied quickly, looking down at Dohyon’s inquisitive face which blossomed with the small smile that grew when Seungyoun smiled back at him. Internally, Seungyoun sighed. He’d tell Dohyon when he was older, he told himself, when he could at least comprehend what Seungyoun had done, even if he couldn’t understand and forgive him. Telling him now would only confuse him, he tried to persuade himself. Or maybe he was just tired. Maybe he just wanted to hide from Dohyon a fact that was so obvious to all the grown-ups around them just from looking at the pair of them.

Upon entering their apartment building, Seungyoun frowned when he saw a parcel crudely hanging out of his mail cubby hole. If it had been his delivery, he would have been infuriated by how recklessly it had been left. However, Seungyoun knew before he even got to it that it wouldn’t be his since he never ordered anything. With Dohyon pulling at his hand because he wanted to go up to their apartment, Seungyoun inspected the parcel. His already low mood dropped even further when he saw that it was addressed to Kim Wooseok, with the intended delivery being for that address across the road. Seungyoun couldn’t help groaning out loud, which alarmed Dohyon and meant that he had to spend a few second assuring him that it was nothing. He understood putting one of the other residents of the building’s mail in his, it was vaguely annoying, but he knew it could happen. He also knew from the bulletins on the noticeboard and the sign above the cubby holes warning mailmen to stop leaving mail for other properties in the apartment building that this type of thing happened all the time. But of course, it was Seungyoun’s luck that the first time this happened to him, he was left with Kim Wooseok’s mail.

“Okay, baby, we have a special quest we have to do before we can go home, is that okay?” Seungyoun said in an attempt to be cheerful, knowing that Dohyon didn’t want to prolong going home any more than he did, though their reasoning would be rather different.

“Yes!” Dohyon cheered, jumping up and down at the thought of an adventure, and though most kids would be disappointed by the reality of what was about to happen, Seungyoun knew Dohyon soaked up new experiences like a sponge and was very unlikely to complain about the anticlimactic event.

“Okay, let’s go!” Seungyoun said and he wasn’t sure who reached out to take the other’s hand first. No matter where they went or what they were doing, they almost always had their hands locked together. Of course, when Dohyon was younger it was a necessity but now he wasn’t sure if it was habit or a clinginess on either of their parts (Seungyoun suspected it was separation anxiety on his behalf).

Seungyoun repeated the thought that he was being stupid like a mantra as they crossed the street. If it had been addressed to any other neighbour, he wouldn’t have thought twice about it. All he had to do was knock, present the parcel and go on with his day, it was truly a simple interaction. But Wooseok made him nervous and this interaction would constitute the most they had ever spoken to each other, and if Wooseok’s glances, or more glares, were anything to go off, he didn’t want to imagine how the smaller man would speak to him. Summoning all his courage after being shot confused glances by Dohyon because of his hesitation, Seungyoun finally brought himself to knock on the flawlessly white, large door. The few seconds it took for Wooseok to open the door felt much longer for Seungyoun who was anticipating being absolutely ripped to shreds the moment the man appeared before him. Upon opening the door, Seungyoun realised he’d never seen Wooseok this close before and despite the confused frown on the man’s face, he was undeniably handsome, though definitely on the prettier side of the spectrum. Seungyoun was just about the open his mouth to explain his presence, having been momentarily paralysed under the weight of the other man’s glare when he heard a small voice from beside him.

“Oh, daddy, it’s the ice prince!” Dohyon exclaimed, and to make matters worse, was pointing directly at Wooseok. Seungyoun felt his jaw drop and his mind go entirely blank as Wooseok’s attention shifted from the small child with palpable excitement at his side to Seungyoun himself. He looked even more confused, but somehow disappointed too.

“Ah, erm… Kids have really amazing retention skills.” Seungyoun fumbled for his words which all felt far out of the grasp of his mind. He was definitely not in the headspace to come up with a reasonable lie, nor eloquent enough to get himself out of it. However, he was smart enough to keep it to himself that he had almost exclusively referred to Wooseok as the ice price to his son, smugly happy whenever Dohyon would regurgitate the term, completely unaware of it being a veiled insult. Seungyoun was only happy that it wasn’t as much of an insult as it could have been. Seungyoun wouldn’t deny that it was slightly offensive as a term, but it did suit the smaller man perfectly. He was prince-like in his beauty and dominating aura, but his gaze was enough to cause shivers down your spine. The nickname seemed faultless to Seungyoun, but that didn’t do much for the guilt he felt when he was facing the man.

“Thank you… For the parcel.” Wooseok had been gaping at him, seemingly in pure shock, before he practically snatched the delivery out of his hands, retreated into his home and shut the door.

Despite their interaction being so brief and meaningless, Seungyoun couldn’t sleep for the thoughts of Wooseok drifting into his mind. No one had ever intrigued him or made him want to prove himself like Wooseok did. No one had scared him like Wooseok did, but at some point that fear of the person had turned into fear or what it meant for Wooseok to fill his thoughts like he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter sucks and I wrote it quickly because it's been a while since I updated and I don't want to jump into the important bits straight away so this is a bit of a filler. I have actually figured out the plot in a roundabout way now so that makes an improvement on the last chapter!  
Please kudos and comment! Comments really fuel and can inspire me too so I'd really appreciate you leaving one!  
Thank you for reading and I promise the later chapters are going to be better!  
Also thank you for all the kudos so far, it's a lot of pressure but I'm so thankful!


	3. Supermarket Saviour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dohyon getting sick was not something Seungyoun had the budget for.

Seungyoun, and consequently Dohyon, lived within a very fragile sphere in which they could just about get by living carefully on what they had. However, if anything out of the ordinary should happen, that stability was automatically compromised. That day, that new obstacle came in the form of Dohyon’s spontaneous illness. It ought to have been a normal Friday, but instead, Seungyoun was woken up an hour earlier than expected by a flushed looking Dohyon telling him he’d just thrown up (and hadn’t made it to the bathroom). Though Seungyoun would never have thought that he’d possessed these instincts when he was a teenager, all his tiredness dissolved immediately as he sat Dohyon down in the bathroom, dampened a towel to calm his temperature, got him some fresh water and a clean bowl so they could leave the bathroom without any worries, collected some blankets to gather around them and cleaned the floor. Dohyon had thankfully been quite a robust child who hadn’t been ill very often, which made situations like this all the more stressful for Seungyoun who couldn’t squash the rising feeling of fear as he looked at his son, whose pale and sweating complexion made Seungyoun want to cry. Dohyon threw up a few more times that hour until he seemed to settle slightly and began to wilt with exhaustion, the exertion and earliness taking its toll on his small body. Seungyoun patted his head and when the boy seemed to fall asleep, he quickly got up to make a call to work.

Seungyoun was lucky in a way; sure he worked for a terrible chain of awful fast food but he’d managed to land a great boss in the form of Han Seungwoo, who had learnt more about Seungyoun’s circumstances than anyone else. Seongwoo must have sensed the panic in Seungyoun’s voice as he nearly immediately assured him that he’d be able to miss his shift that day to take care of Dohyon, but since he was paid hourly, there was nothing he could do about having his wages docked. Half-reassured, half-panicking, Seungyoun pushed the very much unwelcome thoughts about how they would cope without that very much needed cash and turned back towards Dohyon, desperately hoping that his illness would pass quickly.

However, after a few hours of holding out hope, Dohyon’s condition didn’t seem to be improving and he was increasingly complaining about discomfort. Acutely aware of how little was in his bank account with payday a few too many days away, and with the nagging knowledge that they’d be living off even less because of this incident later, Seungyoun, with Dohyon in tow left the house in search of medicine. Any other parent would have left their child in the comfort of their own home under the watchful care of the other parent, but Seungyoun didn’t have that luxury and he most certainly wasn’t going to leave Dohyon on his own. All he could do is bundle him up in layers and carry around a plastic bowl to reduce the embarrassment of having his son vomit in the street or on shop floors. Their walk was quiet, which was a true testament to how terrible Dohyon was feeling since he usually filled every silence. Seungyoun felt like he was coming apart at the seams and was feeling so very frantic and spaced out, yet Dohyon filled him with a determination which allowed him to stay focused just enough to get them to the nearest shop of use to them.

Ignoring the mix of concerned and disapproving looks from customers and employees alike, Seungyoun guided Dohyon slowly towards the medicine. Scanning the aisle to find the children’s section, Seungyoun carefully inspected the descriptions of each type, feeling rising frustration about how he should know which medicine to choose. Finally deciding upon the one that looked the most suitable, Seungyoun’s eyes landed on the price tag.

He was too tired for this, too stressed, too young, too _poor_. It wasn’t even expensive, he just didn’t have the money for it, didn’t have the budget. Feeling stressed and overwhelmed, Seungyoun did something he’d been on the brink of many times but had just barely held off, he started to cry, crouched in the medicine aisle of a small shop.

“Dad?” Dohyon asked quietly, confused evident in his voice as his small body curled up against his father’s as best as he could. Seungyoun wiped at his tears quickly and conjured a fake, small smile to look up at Dohyon but as soon as he did, his eyes were drawn further upwards.

“Seungyoun?” Wooseok said rather a bit too loudly for Seungyoun’s liking, his large eyes widening impossibly. Seungyoun felt like a child being caught doing something they shouldn’t by their parent. As if Seungyoun couldn’t have hated life any more than in that second, fate places before him perhaps the only person besides Dohyon remaining in this world whose opinion, for some unknown reason, actually mattered to him.

“Are you okay?” Wooseok asked cautiously, stepping forward slowly like he was approaching a wild animal.

Seungyoun was far beyond rational thought and self-restraint and so when he looked down at the medicine in one hand and at Dohyon who was holding his other and then back up at Wooseok, his bottom lip started to quiver as a fresh wave of tears crashed over him. He could feel his face burning up with embarrassment and he could feel the tension coming off Dohyon in waves but he couldn’t make himself get it together.

“Hey, it’s alright.” Wooseok said, much more softly now, gently patting his shoulder. It was a kind gesture, but it was evidently awkward for both of them. Seungyoun wasn’t used to Wooseok looking at him in any way other than contempt or judgment and well, Wooseok wasn’t used to seeing his neighbour crying in a supermarket so it was new and uncomfortable territory for the both of them and Seungyoun didn’t really know what to make of this Wooseok.

“I-I can’t a-afford it. He’s s-sick.” Seungyoun choked out, his words intermingled with shaky breaths as he stuttered and sniffled as if he was the child in the situation. He was too young for this. Seungyoun patted Dohyon’s head reassuringly, as the boy seemed to be continuously alternating from staring at Wooseok as if he was transfixed and looking at his father with a mix of worry and confusion.

“I-I can buy it for you. We’re neighbours after all.” Wooseok said after a small pause as if he needed the time to build his courage.

“I couldn’t-“

“You can. It’s for your kid.” Wooseok said firmly, taking the medicine packet out of his hands and walking briskly to pay for it.

As soon as Wooseok turned around, Seungyoun quickly wiped his face again and turned to Dohyon, not leaving himself any time to dwell on the situation, pushing back the inevitable self-loathing.

“I’m sorry, baby. That was scary, right? Remember when you thought you lost your backpack and cried? Daddy had one of those frustrating moments. But it's okay now. We won’t be much longer and then we can get you back to bed.” Seungyoun hugged Dohyon close to himself as his son nodded quietly, looking more tired than anything – Seungyoun had a feeling that they wouldn’t get far into the journey before he’d have to carry his son home.

“Thank you, Mr Ice Prince.” Dohyon said as Wooseok passed the bag to Seungyoun. Seungyoun felt another flush of embarrassment as Wooseok’s sharp eyes passed from him to Dohyon; never had he resented teaching Dohyon manners so well.

“You can call me Wooseok.” Wooseok said in a tone that just wasn’t quite right for speaking to a child of Dohyon’s age. Seungyoun got the impression that Wooseok hadn’t spent a lot of time around children, which seemed to make a lot of sense.

“Thank you Mr Wooseok. Are you a dad too?” Dohyon asked brightly as if he wasn’t sick at all even though it was clear to see in his body language and his appearance. Dohyon was an impressive conversationalist and Seungyoun was extremely thankful that he never usually said anything wrong or offensive. Seungyoun hadn’t doubted that this would be another one of those instances until he saw Wooseok’s expression. There was a coldness to it that Seungyoun was used to from him, but it was undercut by the raw hurt in his expression which knocked the wind out of Seungyoun and brought a furrow to his brow.

“No… No, I’m not.” Wooseok muttered after an uncomfortable pause, looking down and averting his gaze. Seungyoun thought that maybe Wooseok just didn’t like children, but he couldn’t shake the thought that it was more complicated than that, that that wasn’t the look of a man that just didn’t like kids.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know why he asked that, I’ll talk to him.” Seungyoun said quickly, hoping to do some damage control and perhaps figure out what was so wrong with such an innocent question.

“Don’t worry about it, it’s… okay. I hope he gets better quickly.” Wooseok said, seemingly recovered from the shock of whatever just happened as he trained his expression back into a neutral one, the tone of his voice giving nothing away to the point that Seungyoun thought he’d imagined it all.

“Thank you so much. For everything.” Seungyoun said quickly and with a small smile before leading Dohyon out of the shop.

Dohyon thankfully did recover quickly after the incident, though Seungyoun couldn’t say the same for himself, the imagine of Wooseok’s expression seemingly burned into his head. He truly didn’t understand him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tadaaa Wooseok speaks and is helpful - what an unusual occurrence in this fic! The plot thickens; why does he react that way? Please give kudos and comment with your thoughts!


	4. Run Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You must keep your eyes on those who mean the most.

Seungyoun was having a terrible day. He hadn’t closed his curtains properly the night before and was woken up at 5 AM from the bright light shining onto his face. Dohyon woke up feeling as irritable as Seungyoun, saying noticeably less over breakfast but not forgetting to complain about how Seungyoun had burnt his toast. Somehow, they’d ended up being ten minutes late for school, meaning that Seungyoun had to endure the painful drop-off at the school’s reception where his apologies were drowned out by the pointed glare of the receptionist. Running from the school to work cut down his lateness by five minutes, but he was late none the less and clearly sweaty. Seungyoun hated every day at work without exception but that day was exceptionally terrible. To the background of an increasingly pounding headache and an empty stomach, Seungyoun served equally irritated customers. When Seungyoun messed up an order slightly and one customer began raging, Seungyoun was just about ready to scream and walk out, but it was not before his manager Seungwoo stepped in, grovelling pitifully before pulling him to one side.

“I don’t know what is up with you today and you know it would break my heart to fire you, but it’s like you’re giving me no choice. Step it up, Seungyoun, you can’t go on like this.” Seungwoo said firmly, in a tone Seungyoun was truly not used to.

He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes out of frustration but blinked them away. He _needed_ to get back to work because he desperately needed to keep this job. As long as he was here slaving away for hours for little money, Dohyon could stay blissfully unaware of just how on edge their finances were for years to come. Seungyoun knew the minute he became unemployed he ran the risk of child services getting involved because he really would have no money to feed Dohyon every day. With that thought painfully at the front of his mind, Seungyoun somehow made it through his shift, but as he grabbed his personal things from the back, he felt like he could collapse there and then. If it was just him, perhaps he might have. But he had a small person to go pick up and that obligation gave him just enough strength to get himself to the school.

That day, instead of bounding over to Seungyoun, Dohyon walked sluggishly, though still hugging his small body around Seungyoun’s leg when he reached him. Seungyoun thought it was remarkable how whenever he was feeling particularly terrible, Dohyon seemed to be as well, as if his son was such an extension of himself that he absorbed his feelings. However, that meant that neither of them was able to cheer each other up particularly well.

The walk home was as quiet if not quieter than the walk there. Truthfully, Seungyoun was thankful for that since he knew that conjuring the energy to have a conversation was more work than he had the energy for. However, he could never suppress the nagging guilt in his mind that he was letting Dohyon down by not being able to lift the mood.

“Dad, can we go to the park?” Dohyon asked as they were nearing home, a view that Seungyoun had been dreaming of from the moment he walked out the door. The park was at most a two-minute walk away from their flat and it wasn’t a particularly unusual request from Dohyon, who seemed to want to go whenever he had too much energy or if he wanted to cheer himself up. Seungyoun couldn’t remember a time where he’d denied that request but his head was pounding in a way that meant keeping his eyes open was painful.

“Not today Do-Do, Dad is exhausted. Tomorrow, okay?” He said with a tight smile, his mood plummeting even further when Dohyon nodded quietly, his expression betraying how disappointed he was. Seungyoun ruffled his son’s hair lightly in an attempt to comfort the pair of them, but it was of little use.

Returning home, Dohyon immediately scampered off into their bedroom while Seungyoun collapsed onto their sad excuse for a sofa (second-hand clearly based on the rips and suspicious stains). Closing his eyes for less than a minute, Seungyoun was overwhelmed by just how exhausted he felt. However, the day was unfortunately not over yet. Slapping his face to make himself more alert, Seungyoun slowly brought himself to his feet to avoid the blood-rush to his head that would only make his headache more excruciating. Preparing dinner – pasta and the cheapest sauce he could find – was not a difficult task however Seungyoun still wasn’t a confident cook since he had pretty much never cooked for himself before he got kicked out of his parents’ house and having Dohyon meant he didn’t have the time or the money to experiment with. As a result, Seungyoun confined himself to the kitchen to guard the food and prevent any burning, overcooking or other disastrous outcomes. Dohyon knew by now that this was routine and would either sit on the kitchen floor and chat to his father or hide away in their room doing schoolwork, as Seungyoun assumed he was currently.

“Dohyon, the food’s ready!” Seungyoun called out after a few minutes when he deemed the food edible.

Dohyon was a very food motivated young boy, so much so that Seungyoun wondered if he wasn’t being fed enough like some of the critical mothers had said or if it was one of Dohyon’s personality traits. Consequently, when Seungyoun didn’t immediately hear the small thuds of scurrying feet approaching the kitchen he was immediately put on edge.

“Dohyon!” Seungyoun called again, emerging from the kitchen to scan their small living room. Seeing Dohyon wasn’t there, Seungyoun walked quickly into the bedroom and checked the bathroom but again it was empty.

“Dohyon, don’t mess around!” Seungyoun shouted, louder this time though his voice trembled slightly. Dohyon was a playful kid but he didn’t like getting in trouble and if he heard his dad’s voice tone turn more stern he was always quick to give up on any of his games. Consequently, Seungyoun didn’t hesitate to run to the kitchen and turn off the hob and grab his keys.

Running out of their building, Seungyoun felt like he could barely think from panic. Dohyon had never run off before and Seungyoun couldn’t think for the life of him where he could go. He tried not to think of the worst but couldn’t help but fear for his son’s life. Looking hopelessly from left to right, Seungyoun’s eyes landed on the house directly in front of him and before he could give it a second thought, he found himself knocking on the door.

“Seungyoun?” Wooseok asked, sounded utterly confused at seeing Seungyoun cry for a second time. Seungyoun wasn’t sure at what point he started crying but he didn’t feel like he’d be stopping anytime soon.

“I’m sorry, Dohyon’s m-missing and I don’t know anyone else. Please help me.” Seungyoun said quickly, stuttering over his words that came out quicker than he could process them. He sounded pathetic and hopeless, exactly how he was feeling.

“Missing?” Wooseok said, sounding as panicked as the boy’s father, his large eyes practically bulging out.

“I was cooking and he must have gotten out.” Seungyoun said, pulling at his hair and wringing out his hands, his stress so obvious in his body language.

“Okay, give me your phone number and we’ll split up. Would Dohyon stay with me if I approached him? You go left and I’ll go right, okay?” Wooseok said after shaking his head quickly to bring him back to his senses. Seungyoun was incredibly thankful to have Wooseok take control because he didn’t have it in him to come up with a logical plan of action in his panic but he was too unfocused to express it. Wordlessly, the pair exchanged phones and quickly input their numbers. As soon as Wooseok took his phone back and placed Seungyoun’s back in his hands, Seungyoun turned to run away and begin his search but Wooseok caught him by his wrist and pulled him back round first.

“Seungyoun, we’ll find him, I promise.” Still holding his wrist, Wooseok assured him, his eyes conveying his sincerity and just for a few seconds, Seungyoun felt his worries dissipate. But as he turned back round to face the task ahead, his panic surged again. However, hearing a pair of feet slamming against the pavement in time with his going in the opposite direction was undeniably comforting.

Seungyoun must have been running for five minutes straight and his lungs felt like they were burning and he could most definitely feel the strain on his body from not eating anything in around twelve hours. He called out Dohyon’s name continuously, ignoring the occasional odd stares from people passing by. He paused for a moment, resting his hands on his knees and bending over to catch his breath frantically wondering where Dohyon could have possibly gone when his phone rang.

“Did you find him?” Seungyoun asked immediately, without even checking to see who was calling him.

“Yes, we’re at the park down the street.” Wooseok replied and Seungyoun felt all the strength leaving his legs as he dropped down to the floor in relief.

“I’ll be there in a minute.” Seungyoun said as he hung up, not sure if he was imagining hearing Dohyon’s voice faintly over the phone. Taking a deep breath in, Seungyoun rose to his feet though his legs were still shaking and began running again.

“Dohyon!” Seungyoun yelled as soon as he entered the park, eyes scanning the scene quickly until they landed upon Dohyon swinging gently on a swing, with Wooseok sat on the one next to him. Seungyoun dashed over, immediately scooping Dohyon up in his arms and holding him tightly, not wanting to ever let him go or out of his sight ever again.

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to play.” Dohyon mumbled, looking down, clearly understanding that he was in the wrong.

“You know better than to run off without telling me. You can’t do that. We only have each other.” Seungyoun said firmly once he’d put Dohyon down and kneeled down in front of him, holding him by the shoulders and looking directly into his eyes.

“I-I’ll be heading back.” Wooseok cleared his throat but his words came out choked in a way that made Seungyoun furrow his brow, confused as to why the situation would cause him to be so visibly uncomfortable.

“Thank Wooseok, sincerely. I’m sorry that we keep inconveniencing you. I’ll try and make it so that it doesn’t happen again.” Seungyoun said, rising to his feet but clasping Dohyon’s hand in his. Though he wanted to give Dohyon his undivided attention, he felt guilty for taking Wooseok’s money and now his time. They were little more than strangers and Seungyoun knew he wasn’t being fair to the smaller man.

“It-It’s alright, Seungyoun.” Wooseok said with a small smile.

“Can we watch that movie you talked about, Wooseok?” Dohyon chimed in, making Seungyoun look back at Wooseok to clarify.

“You can pay me back by coming to watch it with Dohyon, okay?” Wooseok said directly to Seungyoun before smiling to Dohyon.

“Alright.” Seungyoun nodded as Wooseok turned to leave, waving goodbye in response to Dohyon’s frantic waves.

That night, as Seungyoun fell asleep holding Dohyon tighter, he tried to dissect why Wooseok had reacted the way he had and why he’d agreed to see him again but came out blank and more confused than before. But he supposed he now had an opportunity to figure Wooseok out, even if it came out of a situation he wished he hadn’t been in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies about the delay between updates I've been doing a lot of uni reading before I go back tomorrow! Can't promise regular updates from now since I have to prioritise my studies!  
Anyway, what did you think about the chapter? Please kudos and comment!


	5. Movie Star

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dohyon watches a movie, Seungyoun and Wooseok watch each other.

Having Kim Wooseok’s number was weird, Seungyoun thought as the pair sent a few vaguely awkward messages back and forth. Seungyoun learnt the man’s working schedule and that he was a bigshot accountant – although the smaller man brushed off Seungyoun’s compliments saying that there was no way he’d have his job if his grandfather didn’t own the firm. Seungyoun wanted to resent the ease which Wooseok had in life, but remembered that if it wasn’t for his choice to stick with Dohyon he’d be in the same position as Wooseok, easily slipping into a prestigious role in his parent’s company. Still amidst learning all these new things about Wooseok, Seungyoun couldn’t figure out why he was giving him and his son the time of day. There was really no reason why Seungyoun should be walking Dohyon across the road on a Saturday afternoon to watch the new Aladdin film. Seungyoun was past wanting same-aged friends since he knew his lifestyle was so far from that of people his age that it just wouldn’t make sense to spend his little time with them. As much as Seungyoun wanted to stay home and avoid Wooseok, whose presence still instilled some fear in him as he was unable to unsee Wooseok’s previous glares, Dohyon was excited to go watch the movie and spend time with Wooseok whom his son had surmised within the five minutes he spent with him was ‘nice and kind and pretty’, leaving Seungyoun no choice but to go.

It was just as weird to see Wooseok giving him and Dohyon a small smile as he opened the door to his home. Every other time the smaller man had seen the two of them he was either disgruntled or in shock. Even the slightest suggestion of happiness suited him, Seungyoun thought before shuffling Dohyon inside at Wooseok’s gesture to enter.

Wooseok’s house was stunning; everything looked expensive (and likely was) and was kept in immaculate condition. Perhaps Seungyoun was too used to the lived-in look (read as messy) but he found it somehow clinical and lacking all the warmth a home should have. Trying not to pry or seem a bit too interested, Seungyoun quickly scanned the rooms he could see and failed to see a single photograph, as if the house was just a showhouse and Wooseok didn’t live there at all. The living room was decorated similarly, with it being dominated by the impossibly large TV and sofa that looked too perfect to be comfortable. All the while, Dohyon was happily babbling to Wooseok who nodded exaggeratedly and seemed to respond with either too much enthusiasm like he was talking to a baby or too little as if he was talking to a colleague at work. 

Seungyoun had tried to sit Dohyon between the two of them but he’d fidgeted out of his reach and was too determined to sit on the floor as close to the TV as he could, his small neck craning upwards, for Seungyoun to deny him that small pleasure. That’s how Seungyoun ended up sat next to Wooseok, the uncomfortable distance between them wedged by a bowl of popcorn. The film wasn’t exactly to Seungyoun’s taste and nor Wooseok’s either based on the man’s rather blank expression. However, Seungyoun could see from the shape of Dohyon’s cheeks for the side that the boy was smiling and he could hear him singing along quietly, surprising Seungyoun who didn’t know how or where he would have learnt the words.

“Thanks for this.” Seungyoun said quietly, moving the popcorn bowl so that he could lean closer to Wooseok in an effort not to disturb Dohyon.

“Dohyon’s a cute kid.” Wooseok said softly, his eyes drifting from Seungyoun to Dohyon and smiling at the small wiggles of dancing Dohyon was doing for one of the songs.

“Something tells me you haven’t spent much time around children.” Seungyoun said with a smirk. Even though Wooseok wasn’t even interacting with Dohyon at that moment, his slight discomfort was clear; he looked at Dohyon like he’d never seen a kid his age before.

“Is it that obvious? I’m… A bit awkward.” Wooseok replied coyly, though his words sounded a little strained.

“It’s alright. When it’s your own kid, it comes naturally.” Seungyoun shrugged, wanting to dispel Wooseok’s sudden tension and hoping his words would provide some sort of comfort or reassurance.

“I’m not sure about that.” Wooseok scoffed.

“Really, your whole perspective shifts; things that were important to you before don’t mean anything anymore. Despite everything, I’d always pick Dohyon over everything and everyone.” Seungyoun said sincerely, turning to face Wooseok.

“Really?” Wooseok said as his face rounded out, his eyes widening slightly and his jaw falling.

“Without question.” Seungyoun said firmly as his eyes drifted over to Dohyon, whose head had begun bobbing up and down as the boy fought against falling asleep.

“It’s not that easy.” Wooseok said with a strained smile that almost looked pitiful.

“Surprisingly, it’s one of the easiest choices I’ve ever made.” At that, Wooseok turned his body away from Seungyoun’s and crossed his arms over his chest, looking towards the TV screen but he didn’t seem to really be watching it. Seungyoun feared that he’d struck a nerve somehow, with the way Wooseok lifted his face to the ceiling and blinked repeatedly as if combatting tears. Seungyoun shook his head and told himself to stop overthinking things but as he built up the courage to talk to Wooseok again, the end-of-film credits appeared on the screen. With his fight or flight instincts activated, Seungyoun decided that this was the perfect opportunity to make an exit.

“Do-Do, the movie’s finished.” Seungyoun said, rubbing at Dohyon’s shoulder as the boy had just managed to doze off a few minutes prior.

“Can we play together again?” Dohyon said once he’d turned round to face Wooseok, his round cheeks stretching outwards to accommodate for his wide smile.

“Dohyon, Wooseok is really busy.” Seungyoun butted in, reading Wooseok’s hesitant face and not wanting to impose any more than they already had. Seungyoun truly had nothing to give and the thought of having such an unequal relationship with someone made him feel uncomfortable.

“Please!” Dohyon whined, his cheeks puffing out again.

“Of course, get your Dad to text me when you want to play.” Wooseok said, taking Seungyoun by surprise when he ruffled his son’s hair gently.

“Thank you!” Dohyon exclaimed, attaching his body to Wooseok’s leg and hugging it.

“We’ll let ourselves out.” Seungyoun said as he pulled gently on Dohyon’s shoulder to make him release Wooseok.

“ You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” Seungyoun said quietly, wanting to give the man an opportunity to get out before he committed himself and his time.

“No, it’s okay. I want to.” Wooseok said, clearly having to summon some determination from inside of him.

“See you, Wooseok.” Seungyoun said with a frown. Wooseok seemed to be trying to convince himself as much as he was Seungyoun that he wanted to spend time with Dohyon and the concept of that put Seungyoun on edge. Seungyoun didn’t know what Wooseok’s agenda or intention was, but he knew he’d have to find out eventually. But for now he couldn’t stop Dohyon from wanting to see one of the only adults outside of school that had ever paid attention to him in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoohoo quicker update this time (because I am avoiding doing reading for uni). As I said last time, updates will be irregular!  
Please kudos and comment - what do we think about Wooseok and Seungyoun spending more time together? When will Wooseok open up to Seungyoun? What do you think he'll say?


	6. Swings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the ups and downs of life, things were changing.

Seungyoun felt like his and Wooseok’s relationship had progressed in very clearly defined stages. At first, they were the neighbours with the odd tension, then they kept bumping into one another and now something had shifted without Seungyoun really registering it. Though Wooseok said he’d be happy to see them again, Seungyoun found it difficult to believe him. Yet a month after watching a film together, Seungyoun couldn’t count the number of times they’d seen each other on two hands. Mostly, it was because of Dohyon who seemed to be extremely and easily attached to the older man who was still slightly awkward around him, though had adapted to just play along with whatever game or mood Dohyon was in. However, Wooseok seemed to seek them out as much as they did the other way around. They’d been the park numerous times, on walks around the neighbourhood, they’d had more film nights and Wooseok had been to their flat several times too (though Seungyoun wasn’t sure he’d ever get over the embarrassment).

His relationship with Wooseok was unfamiliar. At some point, whatever barrier that was between them seemed to fall and Seungyoun realised that they were just two young men of the same age, who, despite having vastly different lifestyles, had overlapping interests and harmonious personalities. Seungyoun’s perspective of Wooseok had altered dramatically; from a rational view, he knew Wooseok was a good person and emotionally, Seungyoun was feeling like a bit of a mess. Wooseok made him happy, a concept Seungyoun had resigned himself to not feeling in that way anymore. He’d never really dated before Dohyon was born and he had no idea what love really felt like but he thought that maybe he wasn’t too far off. Wooseok made him simultaneously feel comfortable in his own skin and impossibly insecure about saying the wrong thing.

Yet, slowly falling in love felt like the most natural thing in the world. Watching Wooseok’s cold image melt away to the point that Wooseok would quite happily wear the pink bunny hat he bought Dohyon for the entire evening they were together. The younger man would casually rest his head on Seungyoun’s broader shoulder and take his hand to lead him over to something Dohyon wanted to show them. Wooseok was surprisingly tactile and as much as Seungyoun loved it, he felt like he was going to explode whenever Wooseok touched him. However, nothing brought him more joy than watching Wooseok play with Dohyon. Dohyon looked at Wooseok as if he held the answers to anything, and Seungyoun thought it didn’t look too dissimilar to how Dohyon looked at his real father. Playing happy families with Wooseok made Seungyoun feel rather anxious, nor did he believe it could possibly become a reality, but more than anything it was something he yearned for with a passion that continuously knocked him off guard.

“You know, I think you’ll make a good dad at some point if that’s what you want to do.” Seungyoun said once Dohyon had jumped off the swing that Wooseok had been pushing in the park. Dohyon had run over to a climbing frame and Seungyoun had to balance the delicate art of watching Dohyon out of the corner of his eye as he talked to Wooseok.

“Thanks.” Wooseok said quietly in a way that shut down the entire conversation. Seungyoun opened his mouth to say something, though his brain hadn’t figured out that part yet, when Dohyon yelled for his attention to show off that he’d made it to the top. As Seungyoun jumped up and down in celebration to make Dohyon smile, Wooseok tapped his arm.

“I’m gonna head off.” He said resolutely, his expression becoming closed off in a way Seungyoun wasn’t used to anymore.

“You okay?” Seungyoun said, clasping Wooseok’s wrist to delay his leaving.

“I’m good… I’ll- I’ll see you around.” Wooseok said with a small smile, tugging his wrist out of his hand gently and leaving. He didn’t turn around when Dohyon called his name.

“He didn’t say goodbye.” Dohyon pouted when he reached his father, Wooseok already out of view.

“Yeah… But that’s okay, right? Let’s head back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I'm just really sorry for this one. This chapter is embarrassing short because it is technically half of what I'd planned out for this chapter. I've really had no time since I've been so busy at uni and it's been so long since I updated so I just wanted to put something up. I'm aware of how many people have been paying attention to this fic and I feel a lot of pressure to write well and often but I really don't have to time to do so at the moment so yeah, I hope people aren't too disappointed. The next chapter, whenever I manage to write and post that one, will be explosive so there's that.  
Please comment and kudos as always.


	7. The Unveiling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All - or just about - will be revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brace yourself for the fireworks.

It’d been so long since Seungyoun had genuinely missed someone for an extended period of time. Of course, he missed Dohyon when he was at work but it was more of a discomfort than it was longing. He’d stopped missing his family years ago, his resentment too overpowering for feelings of fondness to remain. Occasionally he felt a pang of yearning for his childhood friends but it passed as quickly as it came. However, two weeks after the incident at the park, Seungyoun missed Wooseok, painfully so.

The whole situation baffled him. When a few days had passed, Seungyoun took Wooseok’s singular reply to his many texts that he was busy with work at face value. When a week passed, Seungyoun felt himself get more desperate and more suspicious, but Wooseok’s blunt messages denied that anything had happened. By two weeks, Seungyoun felt pained and drained, wanting desperately to be with him. It wasn’t helped by the fact that Dohyon asked about Wooseok every day without fail, the young boy so clearly emotionally attached to the older man that he wasn’t sure what to do with his emotions. Dohyon had whined and sulked and attempted to sneak out but in the end submitted to Seungyoun’s disapproval, whose responses were increasingly snappy as his heartache greatened.

Seungyoun wasn’t entirely sure what he’d done wrong but he’d put together a few theories. Firstly, and most painful for him, was that his feelings for Wooseok became so blatantly obvious that Wooseok noticed and, not feeling the same way, Wooseok decided to avoid him. Secondly, that Wooseok had reached the end of his tether, tired of indulging a man and his plus-one son who were only capable of taking and not giving. Thirdly, and the cause that caused him the most uncertainty, had something to do with parenthood. He saw how Wooseok tensed up, how many questions Wooseok had asked. Seungyoun got it, there were plenty of people that knew in their hearts that they didn’t want to be parents and they didn’t like kids and of course being forced to be around one wasn’t going to be a fun experience. Regardless, it all came down to Seungyoun as the cause. He wanted to take responsibility for the situation, but he was so desperate and betrayed that he found himself feeling more angry than he was guilty.

“I miss him, Dad. I liked there being more than just the two of us. Like a family.” Dohyon muttered as Seungyoun hugged him goodnight and tucked him into bed. Seungyoun felt his eyes water and distracted himself by nodding and patting Dohyon’s head.

Leaving the bedroom, Seungyoun didn’t hesitate for a second before grabbing his keys and his jacket and sending a silent prayer that he could get this confrontation over and done with before Dohyon woke up and noticed he was gone.

He felt full of adrenaline as he exited the building and walked across the road but as soon as he knocked on the door he felt it seep out of him.

“S-Seungyoun.” Wooseok said with wide eyes and a quiet voice as he opened the door, stepping back slightly in surprise.

“I’ve got to be quick because I put Dohyon to sleep and I don’t want to not be there when he wakes up. So don’t talk; just listen. You can’t just… Dump me like that. You know I like you so if it’s about that just know I’ll get over it. If it was just me and you then whatever, we’re just people. But you made Dohyon love you. Do you understand how many people have done that? I’m the only person that has ever really cared about him, you can’t just pretend to and then walk out. You can’t just abandon kids like that. Whatever, either stick with us or stay out of our lives. The choice is yours, don’t feel bad about it either way, just make the decision and tell me later.” Seungyoun burst out, in what felt like one breath but had to have been more than that. He could hear how desperate he sounded, how his voice cracked and his eyes watered, how his bold statements just weren’t believable. He could see Wooseok gaping at him while wringing his hands out. Feeling embarrassed and heartbroken, Seungyoun turned around the moment he finished speaking and speed-walked back home, not turning to see Wooseok’s reaction, not wanting to out of fear.

He arrived home, immediately noting that Dohyon was still asleep, relieved but not exactly surprised since the boy could sleep through anything. Then, he walked himself over to the sofa and curled up onto it, letting his tears run down off his face and hit the material which would rapidly dampen beneath him, as he tried to keep his sobs as quiet as possible.

After a few days, Seungyoun took Wooseok’s silence as his answer. He wasn’t surprised since he knew he wasn’t desirable, why would a man like Wooseok who had everything together want anything to do with him? However, just because he had accepted it didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. And it hurt like nothing he’d experienced before. He thought heartbreak was the feeling he got when his family turned their back on him, he had no idea that romantic heartbreak would hurt so much. His mood was down and he knew Dohyon could tell. They spent a lot less time happily chatting and a lot more time curled up next to each other in silence. Seungyoun felt like a terrible father and terrible person, but he knew that Dohyon was feeling a similar feeling to him; he wasn’t the only one who’d been left behind and had their heart broken.

‘Meet me in the park?’ The text, sent by Wooseok at 9pm on a Thursday evening, was, of course, a complete surprise to Seungyoun. He didn’t want to face the rejection face to face, but he found himself scrawling a quick note to leave on the bedside table in case Dohyon woke up before he could stop himself.

The park, which had once held such neutral memories of playing around with Dohyon until he got so tired he would fall asleep as soon as they got home, now was mixed. It’d been where Wooseok had found Dohyon when he’d run away and was arguably where their dynamic began to really change. It was where Wooseok had left him, not to return for weeks. And now, Seungyoun thought it must be where everything would come to an unfortunate end. And he wasn’t ready for it.

He found Wooseok on a swing, idly dangling his legs, clutching a beer can in one hand (a sight which Seungyoun was completely unfamiliar with).

“Were you drinking?” Seungyoun couldn’t help asking as soon as he sat down as if his hands weren’t shaking with nerves and his whole body humming with fear.

“Just a little bit. I wouldn’t have to courage otherwise.” Wooseok said quietly, looking down at his feet like he didn’t have to guts to look up at Seungyoun. Seungyoun, however, was transfixed on Wooseok. His skin seemed to shine in the moonlight and streetlights but his whole aura seemed to lack the glow which had slowly brightened the more they spent time together.

“Go on then.” Seungyoun said, with a firmness he didn’t think he had been capable of at that moment. It was enough to compel Wooseok to look up at him, whose eyes seemed to shine with tears, but Seungyoun willed that thought away and blamed it on the moon.

“I’m sorry… It was just too hard to be around you, both of you.” Wooseok said slowly as if he was trying to be careful. Regardless, Seungyoun felt like a knife was passing through him, like all his hopes and delusions had shattered and the shards were slicing him up. He let out what should have been a scoff but came out choked and strained.

“I-It’s not like that. I… When I was 20 and I joined the family firm, I just wanted to fuck around. There was this intern – I didn’t even like her – and she got p-pregnant. All I thought about was myself and how disappointed my family would be so I… I gave her money and told her to get rid of it or keep it but just to never be in my sight again. I hate myself for it, genuinely. I’d stopped thinking about her so much and then you moved in. I saw you and you reminded me of myself. And I thought you were an idiot for choosing what you did, why would you live like that? And then you just kept popping up in my life and I saw how happy you and Dohyon were, despite everything. And I wanted to understand. It made me happy too. But then, it became too painful. Seeing you was just a reminder that I couldn’t take back what I’ve done so I just didn’t want to see you anymore. But then I realised, I walked out on you and Dohyon like I did my unborn child because I’m a coward. I don’t want to be a coward anymore.” By the time Wooseok had finished speaking, the younger man’s whole body seemed to be shaking and his tears flowed down in quick succession.

Seungyoun couldn’t find it in him to summon words for a few moments. Everything made sense now, but it certainly didn’t make it easy. Seungyoun was shocked of course and disappointed too. He’d wanted better of Wooseok but Seungyoun knew he’d made a difficult decision, and a rare one at that. He couldn’t expect everyone to make the same, especially when there were more days than not when he wasn’t sure if he’d made the right decision, wondering if Dohyon would have been better off elsewhere. However, it wasn’t twenty-year-old Wooseok that Seungyoun had difficult with, it was the Wooseok before him now that made him question everything. The first Wooseok he had encountered, who had been cold and almost cruel, was simple to understand. He was a man who wanted to protect himself, who didn’t want to face the truth. The Wooseok he’d grown to love now confused him more than ever.

“Wooseok. Am I… Are we just a redemption project to you? Everything you did, was it out of guilt? If you’re just using us so you can sleep better at night then leave us alone.” Seungyoun said, hearing the pain in his own voice as he jumped to the most logical conclusion. It made the most sense, what else would cause such a quick change in attitude? Why else would Wooseok even spend a moment of his busy, successful life on them?

“It’s not like that. Maybe it was in the beginning. But I love Dohyon, I really do. And you, Seungyoun… I-“ Wooseok said quickly, stuttering his way through it. Seungyoun wasn’t deaf, he could hear how desperate Wooseok sounded, how genuine his tone was. But it was hard to pay attention to that when every word cut him like a knife, not knowing who or what to believe, not wanting to be led along or truly fall for someone who was disingenuous.

“Don’t. Don’t say it. I think you should go, I need to think about everything first.” Seungyoun interrupted. Wooseok nodded slowly, wobbling slightly as he rose to his feet, with both men wiping away their own tears as they walked away from each other, from everything they knew about each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tadaaaa! I told you it'd be explosive! Finally, Wooseok bares all! Well done to all the people who have commented along the way with their suspicions and have been really close to the mark! With only one more chapter to go... will all become well?  
Also I hit 10k words which is exciting! I might have to drag out the last chapter so that this can be my longest but also my most successful in terms of views, comments and kudos on AO3!   
Please kudos and comment!


	8. Your Warm Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The resolution.

The three days it took for Seungyoun to gather the courage to speak to Wooseok again felt like weeks. He must have come to a different conclusion every few hours; in one moment he was determined to cut all ties to the younger man who had disappointed him and in the next, he was ready to get down on his knees and beg Wooseok to forgive him for taking so long. Knowing what Wooseok had done in his past altered his perception of him, but only slightly. As much as Seungyoun wanted to blame his reluctance on that, he knew that he understood Wooseok’s decision and really, there wasn’t much for him to resent in that regard. It was the not knowing that terrified him. He knew Wooseok was about to tell him that he loved him. As much as the thought filled him with a stinging warmness, it frightened him. How was he to know that Wooseok was genuine? He had thought his parents had loved him but they were so quick to cast him aside. He thought that he loved Dohyon whole-heartedly, but why did he have such recurring regrets? He thought he loved Wooseok, but surely a true love isn’t so shakeable? Seungyoun wasn’t sure if he believed in the idea that it was better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all when he knew how much losing truly hurt.

Grasping the opportunity of Dohyon staying behind at school to practice for an upcoming performance, Seungyoun decided that he would go over to Wooseok’s house and it would be there that he’d cut off whatever had developed between them. It hurt him simply to think about it but he couldn’t imagine a life with someone beside him. He couldn’t imagine spending each day wondering when his luck would run out, when his lover would realise that he wasn’t worth being around since nobody comes into his life permanently. He was being selfish and self-protective, knowing that he was denying himself and Dohyon of something he’d never be able to provide, that if Wooseok was genuine, that he’d be breaking both of their hearts. His weak determination carried him across the road and up to that familiar door. Inhaling deeply, he tried to summon the courage to let Wooseok down gently so that both of them could heal and move on as quickly as possible.

However, as soon as the door swung open and revealed Wooseok, practically drowning in an oversized jumper and with his hair slightly messed up, Seungyoun felt his resolve crumble entirely. Wooseok seemed thin and lifeless in a way Seungyoun didn’t know was possible, the younger man looked like all the energy in his body had been sapped out of him. Wooseok looked at him with something akin to fear or anxiety, as if he already knew what Seungyoun was about to say to him.

“Can I come in?” Seungyoun said softly. Wooseok nodded slowly, looking down as he stepped back and allowed Seungyoun to enter the house, easily finding his way into the living room out of habit. Wooseok settled down beside him, though the gap between them felt doubly as big as it actually was.

“Let’s stop this, us.” Seungyoun said firmly, despite the wobbliness of his voice, after a few moments of oppressive and tense silence.

The breath that Wooseok let out shuddered, as the younger man gripped at his legs and stared downwards, though even from that angle Seungyoun could see the glassiness of his eyes and he felt a sharp pain as if he had been slapped, knowing that he was hurting Wooseok.

“Is it my past?” Wooseok said quietly, bitterly, still refusing to look Seungyoun in the eye.

“No, it’s mine.” Seungyoun knew that his hesitations and his fears had little to do with Wooseok. In reality, they were about his own insecurities and his own anxieties about being abandoned yet again, he just didn’t know if he’d be able to make it through another loss.

“You don’t deserve to be alone forever, don’t force that upon yourself.” Wooseok said firmly, finally looking up and turning to face him, his eyes hardening with determination. If Wooseok’s words hadn’t hit him so hard, Seungyoun might have laughed at how well Wooseok knew him and could see through him.

“Then why am I alone?” Seungyoun whispered, not registering the tears in his eyes until they ran down his cheeks in steady streams. Wooseok scooted closer to him on the couch and reached forwards to dab at Seungyoun’s tears before taking both of Seungyoun’s hands in his.

“Because people were selfish and stupid, I know that more than anyone. But you’re not alone anymore, you don’t have to be.” Seungyoun felt exposed as Wooseok gently placed his hand on his face, his thumb wiping across his cheek, not sure if they’d ever been this intimate.

“Why aren’t you being selfish and stupid?”

“Because I’m in love with you. Sometimes I think that that is the more selfish thing.” Seungyoun felt like his heart stopped when Wooseok said the word he so desperately wanted to avoid but so needed to hear.

“Don’t –“ Seungyoun started, his voice strained whilst clenched his fists. He knew if Wooseok did say it then he really would lose all hope of leaving this house having broken things off. He wouldn’t be able to let go of Wooseok if he said it.

“No, you don’t. You can deny us being together, but you can’t pretend I don’t love you.”

Seungyoun was stunned into silence for a few moments, utterly uncertain about what he should say, what he should do, what he should think. He stared into Wooseok’s eyes hoping to find the answer there but was distracted by the adoration he could see within them. With Wooseok’s hand in his and the younger man by his side, he could feel his resolution crumbling down.

“I don’t have time for a boyfriend.” Seungyoun sighed, grasping at what he could to make his argument, to push Wooseok away while he still could. A weak start he knew, since he’d found time to spend with Wooseok before, what difference would it make if only the label on their relationship had changed?

“I know that.” Wooseok said with a small smile like he could tell that he was started to pull Seungyoun round.

“And Dohyon will always be my number one.” Seungyoun continued, grateful to have a less tenuous argument and one that Wooseok couldn’t disagree with.

“Of course.” Wooseok said firmly, as his thumb glided up and down Seungyoun’s hand in comforting strokes.

“I don’t have any money or any prospects.” Of course, it all boiled down to Seungyoun’s insecurities, about how Wooseok need only find someone on his level or above to live comfortably and in luxury for the rest of his life, whereas life with Seungyoun would never be that easy.

“I don’t care.” Wooseok said slowly, with no hint of uncertainty in his voice.

“What are you in this for then?” Seungyoun sighed, his shoulders folding inwards as his posture slumped forwards. He’d run out of arguments and he’d lost the battle against himself.

“You. The both of you.” The more Wooseok reassured him, the more Seungyoun wanted to believe him and indeed, the more he felt himself believing in and trusting Wooseok’s words.

“I’m scared.” Seungyoun whispered.

“I know, I am too. But Seungyoun, I love you. And I love Dohyon too, more than I thought I possibly could. Let’s try this, let’s try us.”

“And if it doesn’t work out? What then?”

“Isn’t it better to try, than to never know?” Wooseok said with a weak smile, knowing that even he couldn’t promise that.

“I’m trusting you. Please, don’t hurt us.” Seungyoun begged, leaning forwards into Wooseok’s embrace, his body and soul finally feeling at ease despite his inner turmoil.

“Never.” Wooseok said, leaning forwards and pressing a soft kiss to Seungyoun’s cheek, which flushed at the contact. Immediately, Seungyoun felt like he wouldn’t be able to live without this kind of love and attention.

Seungyoun wasn’t sure when he was intending to bring Wooseok back into Dohyon’s life and to tell the young boy about their relationship. However, Wooseok wasn’t too keen on giving him many options, constantly asking him about how Dohyon was doing and when he’d be able to see him again. Thus, only a few days later, Seungyoun told his son that they’d be having a very special person over for dinner and that he should be good. It was obvious that Dohyon was entirely conflicted by his feelings of confusion and excitement, but when the door opened his eyes widened comically and his brief smile was quickly trained into a pout.

“Dohyonie, are you mad at me? I’m sorry, I had some big problems to solve but I’m back now and I’m never leaving again.” Wooseok said, attempting an exaggeration frown but unable to suppress his joy at seeing Dohyon after such a long time.

“Promise?” Dohyon said, his expression faltering with his growing excitement.

“I promise. Come here.” Wooseok said, smiling from ear to ear as Dohyon rushed into his outstretched arms and wrapped his small body around him. When Wooseok lifted his gaze to smile at Seungyoun, the look in his eyes was the warmest Seungyoun had ever known. Yes, this was going to be his life now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! It's over! Apologies about the extremely long wait I've had dissertation deadlines and 2 essays due and really no time to write whatsoever.  
I started writing this with really no plan whatsoever and didn't expect to be so encouraged by the support that this story gained. Thank you to everyone that has read, given kudos and commented it really has been the best form of support and I hope you all are doing well!  
I believe this will be my last fic, at least until I graduate, so don't expect any more postings from me - uni life is too busy!  
Thank you once again!

**Author's Note:**

> Because the first thing you should do while preparing for university, whilst already writing an x1 fanfic, is write another! The idea occurred to me today and I couldn't resist starting it so please kudos and comment if you'd like me to continue writing it! What's up with Wooseok? And isn't dad!seungyoun too precious to be true?


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